Two beginner rules for learning a language.
Rule 1:
Start learning a language right away, at any time, and with any method that works for you.
The most important rule when learning a language for the first time is to start, no matter when or how. If you are reading this, you already have the motivation you need, and it is never too late to begin. Some people say Duolingo does not work for language learning, but I disagree. Tools like Duolingo let you practice vocabulary, sentence structure, pronunciation, and listening, all for a low cost. The key is to begin with any resources you have and keep repeating and reviewing the basics until they stick.
Here’s the good and bad news: people often struggle with having too many choices. (Schwartz, 2004) Imagine if, a hundred years ago, someone could visit your home whenever you needed help with pronunciation or vocabulary, even while brushing your teeth or driving to school. Today, all these options can make it harder to commit to one thing.
There are so many ways to start learning a language, and honestly, I think any method can work. You can spend time researching and explaining why you haven’t started, or you can try doing ten minutes a day. Why not give it a shot, even if it feels small?
A Mark Manson article talked about a study that looked at which type of therapy worked best for mental illness and found that all the approaches helped in some way. Whether someone saw a psychologist, called a friend, or wrote in a journal, each method could support mental health in some form. This approach helped me realise there is never one perfect way. Different tools and techniques work for different people. The main thing is to start and see what works for you, instead of waiting for the perfect version of you.
While mental health isn’t my topic and I have no qualifications to express any beliefs, I use this idea as a guide for learning a language, and I think others can too. It feels empowering to set aside excuses and fully commit to something. With this mindset, the possibility of improvement increases, even though it’s not always easy.
Taking the first step matters, but it is key to keep going through repetition and accept that you’ll forget things. You need to keep reviewing and relearning, even when your excitement fades.
For example, I used to drive five hours to visit my girlfriend, and during those trips, I listened to an audiobook called French Conversations for Beginners. People laugh at the idea of learning this way, and my friends laughed at me, too, but it really helped. The audiobook let me hear a native speaker and someone explaining pronunciation, vocabulary, and sentence structure. I repeated the same things over and over, and it felt silly at first. Even then, I still forgot phrases sometimes when I was starting.
But I learned something important: deep thinking, listening, and long-term practice taught me more than twenty short Duolingo lessons. I spent hours in the car, sometimes feeling frustrated and stressed about remembering everything. But the more I practised, the more I could focus and understand sentence structures.
One day, while listening to the audiobook on my way home, I realised I was picking up phrases before the narrator explained them. I could repeat them before the native speaker did, which felt like a huge relief. I learned a new word and instantly knew how to use it in a sentence.
For example, when I first learned the phrase “J’ai Besoin de,” which means “I need” in French, I also found out it literally means “I have need of.” We don’t say that in English, but learning how French sentences are built helped me understand the French language better.
Basically, the first rule of language learning is to start right away, using any method or tool you have, no matter your doubts or worries. I began with the Duolingo app, which gave me enough vocabulary to keep going and try new things. There will be challenges and stressful moments, but taking that first step and sticking with it is what matters. I don’t want to discourage anyone with the hard aspects of language learning, but to encourage you with my experiences. The most important thing is to start. The journey can be tough, but consistent and honest effort will help you improve. If you’re still reading this, you already have the motivation you need to succeed.
Rule 2:
Try out different ways of learning and experiment until you find a habit that sticks.
When I listened to my first audiobook, the main rule was to let myself forget. “Allow yourself to forget, because we will revisit these words and phrases, and once you repeat them enough, you will start to pronounce and remember them without being reminded”.
At first, it didn’t make much sense, but I tried to make it a rule in my head, too. By allowing myself to forget some words and phrases, I found that when I repeated and reminded myself of them often, they came back.
There’s a lot to learn in a new language: sentence structure, vocabulary, pronunciation, and more. Don’t be hard on yourself if you forget a word you learned ten minutes ago. You need to repeat it for days or weeks until it sticks, and even then, you might forget it again until you use it in a sentence and realise you remembered it without thinking.
If we forget a word, we think there is something wrong with us, without realising it’s there deep down. We are designed to forget and designed to remember; you can’t be thinking about everything all the time at once, you psycho. Trust yourself in the process of hearing, repeating, forgetting, revisiting, and listening.
Trust that you can still live a life and have days when you don’t practice as much. For example, my own guilty pleasure is pursuing any skill or habit with 100% intensity, aiming for perfection rather than consistency. However, I have learned that sustaining motivation is much harder when I expect myself to go 100% rather than commit to steady progress at 70%. This realisation directed me to the principle that consistency, not perfection or intensity, is essential for long-term language learning.
We all have busy lives—we travel, work, see friends and family, exercise, manage side projects, and handle household responsibilities. It is unrealistic to expect ourselves to sacrifice everything for daily language lessons; acknowledging this reality helps maintain balance. Fortunately, technology offers solutions: with apps like Duolingo, you can complete 2-3 short lessons in just five minutes, such as while waiting for a bus. The availability of tools, books, and audiobooks supports the idea that regular, manageable practice can fit into daily life, building consistent effort over time rather than intensity.
With all these tools, learning a language seems easy because you can download an app. But don’t get me wrong—language learning is hard and can be stressful. You need to focus and really pay attention to make progress. You also have to schedule time for it, just like you would for exercise. Whether you spend 20 minutes or 2 hours a day depends on your schedule, goals, and timeline.
I could say it’s easy to schedule 2 hours a day, but I don’t have kids to feed or 5 businesses to run (you know what I mean). I am still a busy person, so I need to schedule my time to learn as if someone is expecting me to show up for a lesson. To make time, you have to value your time and energy, put distractions aside, and set aside some time. You will be surprised by what you can do with 30 minutes of no distractions and deep learning (also, I don’t practise 2 hours a day; risotto takes time to cook, and I value sleep and exercise).
Choose one of these strategies to start with, then add more to see what works best for your learning style. Try it and see where it takes you.
A short story booklet for your level and language
A language app
Audiobook
Flash cards
Repeat words and phrases like a song in your head (I am serious)
Find a friend, colleague, or someone else who knows the language or is learning it.
Conclusion
Learning a language is hard. The beginning is actually the fun part; you get to learn vocabulary and easy phrases that can feel like a challenge. Learning a language is tough. Some days you’ll feel humbled; other days, you’ll feel confident. Don’t let either stop you from practising. Sometimes you won’t understand a word, and other times you’ll feel like you can talk to anyone. The process has its ups and downs, but it only seems harder if you never start.
